Trust Us, We're Professionals

Hey

2009-06-30T21:25:00.000-07:00

I'm Lazy. Enjoy Another Sample. Blah.

FROM THE COACHELLA STORY I WILL NEVER FINISH (I PROCRASTINATE)

It is April 25th, 3:02 pm, and I am finally getting to what we ostensibly came here for: the music. We have traversed the sprawling grass expanse – on weekend leave from its day job as polo field – and now I’m standing in the middle of the Gobi Tent, smallest of the three giant white tents which dominate the South-East corner of the grounds, which means it’s still about half the size of a football field. On stage, the band Battles is doing their sound check – an even more complicated process than normal, given the thicket of guitars, MacBooks, keyboards, and amplifiers through which the band members are scurrying, plugging in a cable here, testing an effect pedal there, tuning this, tweaking that. A truly genre-defying group, Battles have been a favorite of mine since I first heard their robot-circus-instrumental-indie-math-rock (I said they were genre-defying) in high school, and their latest album, Mirrored, has been on heavy rotation on my iPod over the last month. No one else in the B.C.P. crew knows much about them, but we’re here at my behest, and I’m a little nervous as the set kicks off, wondering if my new friends are gonna like my taste in music… wondering if Laura will get it, and there goes the drummer, pounding away, his white polo shirt – buttoned all the way up – and black slacks shockingly out of place on his muscled, sweating frame, jaw clenched, neck bulging, as he just absolutely wails the holy living shit out the snare. That pounding, unceasing juggernaut of a beat holding everything together, as guitar riffs are looped and layered, vocals are distorted, crescendos of sound build and burst over and over again. Battles is as unique a band as we’ll see all weekend, and the smiles on Cody and Alice and B-Don’s faces affirms my decision to drag everyone out here, the bonds of friendship are slowly growing stronger as the lead singer, Sideshow Bob hair emitting a sweat halo, loops a guitar riff, leans into the mic, and exhales a haunting chant…

OOOOONCE… ONE TIIIIME…. ONCE… ONE TIIIME… I WAAAAS AMAAAZED…. NATURAL DELAY… ONE TIIIME… I WAS AMAZED.

Drummer finally stops moving, tilts his tomato-red face towards the heavens, and drops his sticks. My ears are ringing, and everyone’s grinning, as we turn to each other and try to process what we just heard.

SOME SHIT FROM MY WRITING CLASS.

Ears

My ear drums are fucked. WHAT? WHAT DUDE? That’s right. This is the inevitable result of a adolescent passion for death metal, and a concordant disregard for any parentally recommended safety measures. Like ear plugs. Well, it might not have been inevitable – WHAT? WAIT, WHAT’D YOU SAY? – I mean, people mature, and it was no sure thing I’d maintain my death metal allegiance, right? Right! I didn’t – I moved on, to the fat bass and screeching synths of electro, house, drum & bass, dubstep, techno, fidget, and the like. From that point on I would eschewing the ear plugs for concerns of fashion rather than urges of rebellion, but my poor tympanic membrane couldn’t tell the difference – only that it was losing its ability to register a whole new segment of frequencies at the high and low end of the scale. Combine that with the drugs, and the fact that, once the damage started to set in, I naturally began turning up the volume at home – in my ipod earbuds on the way to class, on the subwoofer at my friends’ house parties – and soon I was that guy. Impossible to talk to on the phone. Mumbler extraordinaire. Often seen headbanging while riding my bike to class, music so loud that the friendly cries of “hello” and “fuck youuuu” bursting from my friends’ lips fall on ears that are, while not deaf, certainly working on it. That guy next to you in lecture, tinny noise spilling from the hood of his black zip-up – I’m sorry, I’m sure it’s annoying. I know it’s annoying when I’m on a plane, a bus, or a train – because I’ve had people, many times, tentatively tap me on the shoulder um excuse me could you please turn down your headphones and while my instinct is to go UM, NO, FUCK OFF, my desire not to get my ass beat, by man or by karma, restrains me. So I turn it down for a little bit, and as soon as I’m back in the open air, feet hitting the pavement, getting the city under me, the volume’s back at full blast, and I’m back in my head, in my world. It’s a tradeoff I’ll take.

I hope you like it (no one is reading this, but that's cool!). Coming as soon as I get some more coffee, that Trouble & Bass Party recap thing. And why Shaq to the Cavs is more meaningful in the abstract than in the concrete world of playing basketball. And the beauty of grilling Carne Asada. I got ideas, son.

Oh yeah, happy birthday to my good friend Alex Carillo. Tonight I am further delaying my writing to go celebrate it, as he further delays working on our comic adventure collaboration. As soon as we do something, you'll see it.

PEACE.

- Dan

From The Grave: Eli Escobar at Temporary Spaces

2009-06-24T14:28:00.000-07:00

Figure 1: Eli (Ell-Ee) Escobar

Hi. So. Looks like this blog isn't dead, even if it is floating in the purgatory that is blogger.com - possible move to wordpress pending, I'll be sure to notify all 2 of you if that happens. As part of my Life Plan, this space is now going to include all sorts of my writings - music reviews, concert/dj recaps, stuff that people are interested in, etc. I hope this is pleasing to you. At the very least, I'm gonna be posting on a bi-daily basis for the forseeable future, as a way to release the creative stagnation that living at your parents' place foments. It would be all to easy to sit on the couch for the next month. but, WE CAN DO BETTER.

So.

New Feature (!): Shit I Done Went To.
1. Monday June 22 - Eli Escobar @ Temporary Spaces (Fountain & Normandie. East Hollywood whaaaat).
My first attempt to get out of the house and into LA, during this long summer of discontent. My and JT PESOS rendezvoused at his place, in the BH (the one time I didn't mind driving out there... thank god for the lack of traffic on a Monday night), to drink absolut and san pellegrino. very bourgeoisie, and not tasty at all. The objective, a sloppy drunk, was only acheived for like 45 minutes. Should just drove straight to the venue, and avoided the late, semi-inept taxi experience - one more reason to hate LA - and used the cash on overpriced drinks. Although, $6 for a Red Stripe is pretty par for the course, and I guess I should just be used to it by this point. Anyways, once arrived at Temporary Spaces - an aptly named venue, just an unmarked door on a corner, its significance belied only by the bouncer and list-girls out front, we alighted from our gas-guzzling chariot, and approached the disconcertingly unpopulated corner. No lines here. This vaguely amateurish vibe is in no way dispelled when Pesos starts chatting with the list girls... only to discover that they went to high school with his little brother. What the fuck? Can you work the door at a club when you're 19? It's not like we're 30 or something, younger siblings' friends should be neither seen nor heard when heading out...

Anyways. Upon entering the place, there is nobody up in my face, because there are hardly any people in the bar. A smattering of hip-hop hipsters - big white tees, clark kent glasses, tight pants, fly nikes, maybe a sick LA hat, you know the deal - and like 3 semi-beat blonde chicks at the bar, some people posted up along the walls on stools and in booths. Despite the lack of a social atmosphere, I gotta give props to Temporary Spaces in and of itself: it's the kind of bar that is my shit, all dim, color filtered lighting, big varnished wooden bar with brass accents, a wide variety of fine whiskeys lined up behind, simple leather seating. Six bucks later, I'm sipping on a Red Stripe, and six minutes later, I'm heading to the men's room. Upon exiting the commode, I bump into Trevor, a.k.a. DJ Skeet Skeet, the promoter of this fine event, and decide to act like I know him and give him a holla. Skeeter and I discuss our shared appreciation of Eli Escobar's old school NY house excellence, and our shared concern about the disconcerting lack of people in the place: He is "legitimately kinda pissed, to be honest." I commiserate, then realize... it's time for another beer!

"Another Red Stripe... yeah... you guys take credit? Sure...what the fuck? $20 minimum? Sheeeit... yeah, do it" Well shit now I need to buy at least 3 more beers tonight. I gotta start carrying more cash on me. Or drinking more beforehand. Or having a lower tolerance for the booze. Or SOMETHING. Anyways, Pesos spots everyone favorite bearded fat man (and Harvey Feinstein look-a-like), DJ Thee Mike B, resident @ Dim Mak's Banana Split Sundaes (Sundays... duh... at Bardot). Dude is cool enough, I suppose, and suggests that Skeeter should chill out, that "this place always fills up after midnight anyways." And he only sounds moderately like a pretentious dick when, while discussing how awesome Eee-lye Escobar is, he informs us that it's actually pronounced Ell-ee. Whatever.

An hour later, sure enough, Mike B was right, and the place is close to packed - the cigarette smoking "patio" (dungeon might be a more appropriate word) might be the densest concentration of second-hand smoke in the greater LA area (I'm still coughing), and the dancefloor is popping. Unfortunately, at least by my standards, it's popping to some new DJ, Eli is done, and it's all dancehall - that funky island shit. Which is cool, you know, for like a song or two, mixed in a Diplo set or something, but isn't really my steez. Still, watching the territorial conflict, between a white hip-hop hipster and an African (dude was dark) slickster (suit jacket, fancy pants, etc.) for the right to assert their male dominance by dancing with a fine-as-fuck Erykah Baduh look-a-like is pretty hilarious. Let's just say the white guy has a decided handicap due to his inherent (lack of) dancing ability. Despite this compelling battle, I've just finished beer number four, which means I've finally broken through the chains of the credit card minimum charge that have been holding us here. It's time to go home.

Waiting outside the bar for a cab, stupid LA cabs, where the hell are they when you need one... oh here comes one oh wait it just drove past us what the fuck - "Yo, that motherfucker didn't pick you guys up cause you black!" opines the esteemed african-american gentleman standing outside with us, while his compatriot chuckles. "Yo, it's cause he could tell we're Jews yo! - we're the other black!" And with everyone outside laughing, we snag the next cab, and we're off. Till nex time.

- Dizzy Dan

NEXT TIME, ON BARELY EDUCATED: SHIT I DONE WENT TO:
DAN RECONNECTS WITH DJ SKEET SKEET AT THE TROUBLE & BASS CD RELEASE PARTY @ THE ECHO. FAT BASS, MOSH PITS, DRUG USE, BODILY HARM AND DESTRUCTION OF PRIVATE PROPERTY - YOU DON'T WANNA MISS IT! TUNE IN, SAME TIME, SAME PLACE!

Thoughts from the Recession

2009-05-04T14:46:00.000-07:00

Word.

I have an ongoing list of things I want to happen because of the recession:

-Concerts and sporting events become cheaper and easier to buy tickets for.

-More people become nurses and teachers.

-Financial Doucheness becomes a thing of the past.

-Marijuana is legalized due to the tax income for state budgets.

-All party photographers become homeless people.

On another note, TUWP fam Emile killed it last night at his performance. I have no idea what things like that our supposed to be like, but I imagine not many feature J Dilla tributes. Hearing those trademark sirens was a really pleasant surprise. Here's a song that was reimagined last night ( I think, at least).

J Dilla- Last Donut of the Night

And happy Cinco de Mayo. Can't wait for all of us non-Mexicans to use a fake holiday barely celebrated in Mexico to commemorate a battle against the French army that delayed them from occupying the capital for a couple of months by eating and drinking a lot of Mexican stuff. No seriously, Mexican food and beer are DELICIOUS. Who wants to go to El Sitio with me?

Coachella: Youtubes and words

2009-04-23T14:33:00.000-07:00

Somehow, I have managed to have something to do or distract me at all times the last couple of weeks. I'm playing catch up at all times. So, in light of this, some memorable moments from the Coachella 2009 festival.

Ravey Tunes

Surkin had already achieved "Download everything this guy puts out immediately" status, and now he has achieved "Ill DJs I will try to see everytime possible" status. Killed it in the afternoon.

Crookers

Y'all know me. I get loose on the reg. I got loose for Crookers. They started with a punch in the face and kept it going. When you open it with this banging Major Lazer song, and you've got a pretty dope Italian hypeman people respond to, I am able to get loose. I sprinted into the tent right then and partied the hardest of the weekend during this song. (Major Lazer, which is Diplo and Switch btw, is already my CD of the summer, after having heard 2 songs.)

AND THEY PLAYED THE TOAD SONG!(at 22 seconds)

I had downloaded this song off the Mad Decent blog (where else, right?), and thought it was retarded. I WAS WRONG! It is actually the best song of the year, and it was so sweet live. It is infectious too. It goes great with Mario Kart or trying to dance your blues away after a Laker loss.

Download: Toad's theme

Mad Decent write up of the song

Related: I noticed a strong generation gap between the DJs at Coachella. I felt so much more energy coming from Crookers and Surkin than vets like Felix or the Chemical Bros. Those old guys, and Felix is the posterboy for this, are stuck in the DJ as an idol who controls the crowd and is there to be worshipped. I saw about 30 minutes of Felix before I got fed up with waiting years for buildups to drop with Felix holding his hand up to try and get us pumped. I attribute this to the breakup of the DJ/crowd divide. Once upon a time, DJs were held up as the bridge between electronic artists and the fans. It required tons of time and money to become a DJ. What they did was a beautiful mystery to the average person and the crowd would have complete trust in their DJ to be playing the hot shit. The landscape has completely changed. Everyone's tried DJing on their own. Everyone has downloaded all these songs from hypemachine. The cover's been blown. It's not about you anymore, DJ, its about the crowd. Anyone can do this, it's not hard. Cut the weak theatrics, rock the party, and do some creative mixing. I'm not down with dudes sitting on their electronic royal chair when the young guns are more loose-friendly.

Non-ravey tunes

By Sunday evening, I was running on fumes. Sunday's lineup had dead time unlike any other Coachella I had been to. On a whim, I went to check out Devandra Barnhart's set in the small Gobi tent. All I knew about the dude was he is classified as "freak folk" and was suggested to us by pretentious people who we had little musical taste in common. When we got there, the place was rocking and it turned out to be the most pleasant surprise of the festival. Dude could be the smoothest cruise ship lounge singer ever.

By the end, I was satisfied that after 3 years, I have pretty much "done Coachella" as hard as I could. I don't know if I will be back next year (definitely not camping), but I know without the same people, it will not be nearly as great an experience. (That is the sappiest I will ever get on this blog.)

Coachella Tales: Chapter 1

2009-04-15T05:57:00.000-07:00

I guess this is cheating, since I didn't write it expressly for the blog, but fuck it, it's not like anyone reads it anyways. If JTPE$O$ doesn't dig it I'll stop. Here's the first part, completely raw and unedited, of a short story i'm working on that is a retelling of the amazing event that was coachella 2008. Hopefully this upcoming weekend will be just as fertile ground for interesting happenings...

oh yeah and coachella mini-mix at the bottom of the post.

Three Days of Madness: Or, The Best Weekend Yet.

We’re lost in Diamond Bar. We can see the freeway, it’s right there, gotta be less than a half-mile away, followed all the signs, only all of a sudden the road is gone. Literally, a fat chunk of macadam just excised from our route, bright orange cones and shiny reflective barriers telling us STOP GO BACK NO FREEWAY HERE, a dirt river that our steel horse can’t ford. I’m on the phone with B-don, telling him to stay awake, it’s only 11pm, we’ll be there soon, don’t go to sleep, we’ll be there soon, yes, yes, I know we were supposed to be there, yes, we’re lost in fucking Diamond Bar. Yes, Diamond Bar. No, I’ll explain later. So I hang up, look left, and tell Will to pull into the next gas station, because god-dammit, I will not be alone at Coachella this year, and B-don is waiting, and yes he’s awake still, and we’re an hour and a half away, and this is the night before the day that is the start of 72 hours that I will never forget, if I can remember them.
It is the twenty fourth of April, 2008, and I am still smoking cigarettes, so I reach in my pocket for a cheapo plastic lighter, the kind that always breaks, and touch its overeager flame to the end of the smoke – genus Camel, species Light – that’s already between my lips, and roll down the window as I inhale. This is good, this is right, the nicotine entering my bloodstream heightening my anticipation and lowering my agitation, because it is, after all, the day before Coachella, the anticipation 364 days in the making, the agitation from 4 hours of waiting for friends who never came, 3 hours of crawling through the Valley on the 101, traffic done as only LA does it, and whatever asshole work crew was too busy to be bothered to put up detour signs after they biopsied an asphalt artery back to the 60, leaving Will and I driving the empty streets of this suburb-of-a-suburb at the twilight hour, trying desperately to get back on track. Orange-hued light from a chain of streetlights, infinitely long stretching out before us, let me know that we’re still somewhere, before finally we see a gas station. A cop car. I drop my cigarette out the window. Will wheels the truck around, the cop staring at us as we pull in.

“Hello officer, we’re just trying to find our way back to the freeway, we got lost trying to get around some road construction, could you tell us how to get back to the 60 East?” I say in my best Responsible Citizen voice, and wait for an answer from the shadowed window to whom I addressed my plea.
Officer Smith, brave protector of Diamond Bar, Truth, Justice, and The American Way looks up at the two college-kid punks who just pulled into his gas station. What the hell are these kids up to, driving around his sub-suburb at 11:30 at night on a Thursday? Probably smuggling drugs in the back of their Jap-made pick up truck, what’s under that camper shell? Oh look, the one in the glasses is sauntering over, like he owns this place, the tall one listening to some fruity techno shit in the car. Stupid punk comes right up to the patrol car window, like he has any right, and says
“Hello officer, we’re just trying to find our way back to the freeway, we got lost trying to get around some road construction, and we’ve got to get to our pinko-commie-tree-hugging-devil-worshipping music festival before we just break down and start stuffing our mouths with all the pills and pot and psychedelics we’ve got stashed in the back of our truck, because, god-dammit, we hate America.”
Officer Smith knows this could be a ruse. Better just give the assholes directions to the freeway and let somebody else deal with him, ain’t gonna be any trouble in his burg. So he does, but not before giving the four-eyes a nice hard stare, to let him know that he knows what’s going on. The truck pulls out, takes a right, finds the on-ramp, the only car on the road, tail lights getting smaller and smaller, disaster averted, back on course for what Officer Smith knows must be trouble.

----------

End Chapter 1.

Coachella Mix - I didn't make this, someone on the coachella message board did. but it's worth downloading, nice mix of coachella tunes. - DOWNLOAD

Franz Ferdinand – Lucid Dreams
Ghostland Observatory – Club Soda
The Presets – Steamworks
Crystal Castles – Reckless
The Kills – No Wow (MSTRKRFT Remix)
N.A.S.A. – Gifted (Ft. Kanye West, Santogold, & Lykke Li)
Peter, Bjorn and John – Let’s Call It Off (Girl Talk Remix)
Yeah Yeah Yeahs vs. Daft Punk – World Maps (Along Came Jones Edit)
M.A.N.D.Y. and Booka Shade – O Superman (Ft. Laurie Anderson) (Felix da Housecat Remix)
Gui Boratto – Gate 7
Plump DJs – Rocket Soul
The Crystal Method – Weapons of Mass Distortion
Surkin – Chrome Knight (Ft. Chromeo)
Sebastian Tellier – Kilometre (Aeroplane Remix)
Etienne de Crécy et Monsieur Jo – Hanukkah
The Chemical Brothers – Hey Girl, Hey Boy

that's the tracklist.

and for kicks, a band of horses (playing on saturday) song I really like. this one's for smurray.
our swords - DOWNLOAD

Song of the Day- Eighth Grade Edition

2009-04-08T21:39:00.000-07:00

I never got around to "THE BANGING B-SIDE '.

Song: Memphis Bleek ft. Jay-Z, Missy Elliot and Twista- Is That Yo Chick?

(You should already have this.)

I was reintroduced to this song over last summer by Boy 8-Bit's Mad Decent Podcast, where 8-bit sweetly looped the beat and played Jay-Z's verse amongst a bunch of minimal tech-house "i have no idea what the fuck genre it is." There's nothing next level anymore about mixing rap into a electronic set, particularly when its a Mad Decent podcast. It's almost expected when your founder is Diplo that everything is going to be influenced by hip-hop. I distinctly remember a few years ago hearing mixes by Ed Banger artists where they would drop a hip-hop track amongst all the "bangers" and A-Trak's still at heart a hip-hop DJ. Essentially, the ties go deep. What struck me the most when I heard that mix is that the song drew no attention to itself as a rap song.

I heard Mr. Oizo spin once and he dropped Snoop's "Beautiful" in the middle of his set. It validated the song in one respect and it served as a noticeable break from the rest of the set. Ed Banger was(/is? Their relative fall from grace is a whole other topic.) extremely image-conscious, to the point that they would flat out say that things like "So Me designs are just as important as the music." They were too "cool" for the old techno establishment and playing rap music was a way to say "Fuck you" to the image of techno being played in posh bottle clubs for Eurotrash douches only. They had an all-inclusive aesthetic, and rap was a part of this, just like the Marshall amps at Justice concerts incorporated rock elements. It was all part of a grand vision, and they wanted you to notice this vision included rap.

Nowadays, it seems like there are a lot of rap songs that would fit into house sets. Electro guys are getting rappers over their beats to mixed results (cough, MSTRKRFT, cough), and some rappers/Black Eyed Peas are jumping onto the forefront of the electro bandwagon. I'm almost positive that if "Is That Your Chick?" was played at a party, a lot of people would think it was something crazy for Jay-Z to get on some kinda-dubstep track. Its BPM is a whopping 133, it mixes well with everthing with no intention of doing so. Tried it with dubstep, bmore, electro, whatever, it works. Normally, the DJ has to slow down the set and have a hip-hop section; but not here. It is at its core hip-hop that has a strong fast electronic influence without trying to be something its not. Its refreshing for me to hear 8-bit riding for some ACTUAL hip-hop in his sets, rather than trying to electrofy something that doesn't need to be fixed.

And maybe above all else, it's an under-appreciated song that holds up really well, even if MEMPHIS BLEEK IS A HORRIBLE RAPPER. The song sounds like it could have come out TODAY, besides the fact that this is blatantly referenced:

Trick Daddy - Shut Up
Uploaded by Aik361

WOW 2000 WAS AWESOME.

My Bad

2009-04-07T18:47:00.000-07:00

Woops.

SO! It turns out the song that I really wanted to post last time was NOT the Edu K/Nadastrom joint (though that is pretty sick too), but was in fact the previous track in the mix (I guessed wrong when I looked at the tracklist!) Instead it's this nice little slab of pretty much pure dubstep, though I love that old-skool flava vocal sample.

Witty Boi - Ironman VIP - DOWNLOAD - You know what to do.

and because I found whilst looking for the above track...

Nastee Boi - Bangorz - DOWNLOAD - BASS IN YOUR FACE. now THIS is straight dubstep. nothing new under the sun... but who gives a fuck about the sun? let's smoke some weed in some dark damp alleys, file into the warehouse as mist falls on our black hoodies, put out your cigs, finish your beers, don't put your nike high tops in a puddle, and head towards the fucking massive soundsystem that looks like the bastard love child of a harmon kardon and THE GOD DAMNED DEATH STAR and get ready for the bass to go DARTH VADER on our asses. good times. i'll see you saturday at lot 613...

Since

2009-04-07T16:32:00.001-07:00

I have no idea if anyone actually reads this, if you post something - anything! - in the comments, I'll buy you a beer, or a double-double, roll you a j, or do something else awesome that fits within the constraints of time, distance, and me being relatively broke. Yes, I am now bribing people to interact with me. Well, I was a long time (3 ish years) fraternity member, so some would say I should be used to it. WHATEVER WORKS FUCKERS. I want to see some activity!

oh yeah and obviously limit one per customer. and say something. i'm not buying you a god damned 30 rack or rolling you a carton of fatties because you posted "hi" 50 times in a row.

EPIC BASS

2009-04-07T13:22:00.000-07:00

THE EPICEST BASS. BASS. BASS. WHATEVER.

Little min post here, just to let all of you bass fiends (me. maybe jt pesos. will, if he ever reads this blog...) about this absolutely destructo-crushing mix that I was linked to by.. wait for it... my dad. See, Sasha Frere Jones (SFJ... google it), esteemed music critic, and New Yorker online blogger, shares my craving for fat crunchy LAZER BASS. And my dad, aging hipster that he is, loves el Nuevo Yorquero ( I mean I do too, but whatever), and so he passed along this little bad boy to me, just saying "this is a little beyond my comfort zone.. but thought maybe you'd like it". WELL HE WAS RIGHT. I DO!

TROUBLE & BASS FABRIC TAKEOVER PROMO MIX - FROM DISCOBELLE.NET - CLICK HERE. Fine. Direct link... HERE.

B-B-B-B-B-ONUS! MY FAVORITE TRACK FROM THE WHOLE GOD-DAMNED THING:

RICO TUBBS - BORN TO BOUNCE (SUPRA1 REMIX) - DOWNLOAD - SO EPIC... ASS LIKE THAT, SHE WAS BORN TO BOUNCE... BWAMP BWAMP BWAMP BWAMP CAN'T WAIT TO GET DRUNK AND BLAST THIS...

Oh! DOUBLE BONUS!

EDU K - RAVER LOVIN (NADASTROM REMIX) - DOWNLOAD - Well, y'all should know that I harbor an unhealthy obsession with Nadastrom from when I saw him tear it up dj'ing at club 9:30 in DC. B-More meets rave meets electro meets fat booty shaking bass. Another party banger. And who can't relate to needing a little raver lovin'?

SotD: So Many Days Gone

2009-04-05T23:19:00.000-07:00

Les Petits Pilous Sounds Like It Means The Small Pillows

Too many days gone to get a song for each one... tonight at least, as I want to go upstairs and watch Dr. Strangelove, which Steve has been waiting to do since he finished off brewing the newest batch of delicious homemade beer. A Cream Ale today.. I'm stoked. I think we might have to start bringing beer stuff onto the blog, because homebrews rule, and beer is just amazing in general, but you don't need ME to tell you that. What you do need me for is getting some new tunes. Well, "need" might overstate the relationship, but let's just assume that someone might download these.

SONG OF THE DAY - 4/5/09 - SHIT I FORGOT TO POST FOR 3 WEEKS EDITION.
Today we have some non-bangers for the chill-out set, a medium-grooving disco take for the hipsters, and, of course, a few bonafide dancefloor exploders. EXPLODERS, I TELL YOU!

Chillness is female vocals, spare drum beats, and a barely there bassline that makes you want to light one up and lie back in a loving embrace on the couch. If there's actually someone with you even better, but the weed does a pretty good embrace if not.

1. Little Boots - New in Town (Fred Falke Remix) - DOWNLOAD - this one's for my good friend Ben, in reference to the need to chill out a bit after getting into road rage fist fights in hollywood...
2. La Roux - In For the Kill (Skream Remix) - DOWNLOAD & In For the Kill (Foamo's Remix of the Remix) - DOWNLOAD - Rainy days, long lost loves, etc. Smoke a cigarette while dramatically staring off into the distance while this one plays. Skream is morning times, Foamo is night.

Bangers are when 3000 people are all on the beach, drunk and salty and sweaty and wet and hot and just breaking it the fuck down, and then some shit comes busting out of the speakers that just gives everyone temporary epilepsy and that shit drops and you FREAK THE FUCK OUT. That's what it's all about, ladies and gentleman. Floatoapia 2009 was the illest, probably will never again be as cool as it was this year, so here's a song that made it bounce out on the sand on Saturday, and one to make it bounce on the dancefloor next Saturday.

1. Les Petits Pilous - Wake Up - DOWNLOAD - HOLY SHIT. Nuff' said. Absurdly dirty.

2. Proxy - Tha Raven (Les Petits Pilous Remix) - DOWNLOAD - Yes, yet another remix of that fantastically filthy track from Russian doom-meister Proxy, but damn if it isn't worth rocking out to. Strictly necesary? Maybe not, but then again, are dance parties? A little repetition through reinvention is great to groove to, and besides, now you have TWO Les Petits Pilous made tracks.

Oh Yeah! The 'medium bangers'. Just one - for the good times of the next day, when it's still nice out, and you're just taking it easy, getting life back together. Enjoyable.

1. Animal Collective - My Girls (Hatchmatik Disco Bootleg) - DOWNLOAD - A.C. are amazing. My Girls might be my favorite song of the year so far... cliche but true. So good. Add a little dance spice to the hauntingly catchy vocal hook with this mix.

The Redemption of the Thorpe

2009-04-05T22:44:00.000-07:00

Gotta Fight the Laziness...

Damn, it is way too fucking easy to not post. Spring break... then the rugged party times of the the first week back. Lots of opportunities to post, lots of good stuff to talk about, and where does it go? Well, those times are over. Posting is back. Daily songs, other shit as often as possible. Coachella previews coming soon, maybe some mixes, who knows - and if you're one the elite few who read this blog, we want your contributions. Be it a cool song you found, an interesting thought about the NBA, or just a fucking funny story - pitch in!

Anyways.
So back in the day, before things done changed, I sent some questions to esteemed espn.com analyst and pro baller trainer David Thorpe, and sadly thought he wasn't gonna get back to me... well, as you could probably guess by now, he did! And it was actually a while ago, and it's just been me being lazy that's prevented this post from going up. So here we go, offical first april post: Barely Educated talks Trevor Ariza w/the Thorpester.

(Barely Educated): Trevor pretty clearly is a valuable contributing member of the Lake Show, and I remember him always playing well in his brief chances in NY (where he was held up as part of Isiah's drafting acumen.. and can't hate on that! [just everything else]), and Orlando... basically noone's every denied he's a talented kid... so why did it take this long for him to get some consistent minutes?

(David Thorpe): I think Ariza has just been a little unlucky in terms of who has been in front of him and who is coaching him. He's in a great spot now, so seeing him blossom is not surprising.

(Barely Educated): How many Brian Cooks is Trevor Ariza worth? 3? 5? Also, why does Brian Cook have the facial hair of a vagrant? Laker fans have only contempt for the Cookie Monster.

(David Thorpe): [Thorpe didn't answer this. Perhaps Brian Cook's playing for the Magic, and hence his close promixity to DT (who is based in the Tampa area) means he didn't want to start beef. I stand by Cook's worthlessness]

(Barely Educated): Let's assume that Orlando traded him b/c they thought he couldn't shoot the 3 (so vital in SVG's system). Although Ariza is no Ray Ray/Peja/etc., he's making about 30% of his attempts this year, and from my perspective at least, his stroke looks decent - maybe he'll never be a 40% guy, but 35% doesn't seem improbably to me, with more reps. Was this more a case of him always having had the fundamental ability but not being given the chance, or does his form look actually improved since his days in Orlando? Trevor seems to be a hard worker, so I could see either one.

(David Thorpe): He looks smoother and more confident in his jumper, and I expect it to get better for 3 or 4 more years straight. Learning when to shoot and where to take the shots from will help his % increase as well

(Barely Educated): On that note, could you briefly assess his progress as a ball handler? When we traded for him the rep was that he was a jumper, that's all, but he's shown more than that in LA.

(David Thorpe): [I think Thorpe just answered this question in his answer to the the next one. Maybe. I'll take it.]

(Barely Educated): Finally, given all of the above, what do you see as Trevor Ariza's ceiling? Very-good non-All Star (a la battier/bowen)? Couple time all-star? Essential key to title runs (Dennis Green/Michael Cooper)? Something else? I'm driver of the Trevor Ariza Will One Day Be An All Star Bandwagon... let's hope I didn't jinx it.

(David Thorpe): I've always thought of him as a basketball player that is a phenomenal athlete, not the other way around. He just needed to grow into the player we expected him to be, just like everyone else. I expect him to keep getting better at all aspects of the game and turn into a very good starter. It's possible that he earns an all-star birth one day, but not so likely. But I'm a big fan of his game

(Barely Educated): Bonus Questions: what's your favorite food? favorite hip-hop song if any? favorite opera? favorite seinfeld episode? favorite character? Is Lamar still Elaine with the way he's been playing? Who wins in a fight, Ronny Turiaf or Josh Powell (a.k.a. ronny 2.0)?

(David Thorpe): I'd have to say my favorite food is most kinds of sushi or sushi rolls (especially from Ban Thai). Not sure about favorite hip-hop (there are many) but I really like "Miss Independent" right now, reminds me of my wife when we met 22 years ago. I love "Turandot" and specifically the aria "Nessun Dorma". Best Seinfeld episode is impossible to name, but I love "The Switch" because I got to know it's lead writer, Sam Kass, and he sent me a copy of the script. George's dad is amazing, but I love all of them. No, Lamar is definitely not Elaine right now, and I hope he never returns to that role (Batgirl either, for that matter). Powell is a tough kid, very tough.

There you have it! Pretty politically correct, but you probably don't want to rip on the huge athletes you work with every summer. And I think we all new Powell was gonna win that one. Now if only Lamar can keep not being Elaine when Bynum returns...

Guest Post: Anger Management For Your March Madness

2009-03-25T18:55:00.000-07:00

A guest post from my 13 (!) year old cousin:

What's going through the mind of a champion (and Kobe when he drops more than 30 points)
OR
What every underdog envisions in the tourney

So as I'm watching the second round games of the tourney and realizing how boring of a tournament this may turn out to be (and how so far, 37 out of my 48 picks have been correct), when something hit me: this year's amateur ballers striving to be the cream of the crop are going to be next year's NBA Draft picks - and the only true Cinderella this year is Arizona. But March Madness shouldn't be a time of "madness." In fact, I think it's just the opposite - until the Final Four anyway. It's when you spend your weekends watching over-hyped games - that either end with a conversial steal and dunk/lay-up by the best black guy in the game or that white guy who shoots 95.8% from the free throw line hitting 2 free throws in the "clutch" - while sipping down an ice tea, and checking your bracket every hour. While it may seem like an exciting display of basketball - much more interesting than the NBA - it's also a league of uncontrollable, extremely confused and usually lucky players and teams.

But what makes March Madness so special? TRADITION. March Madness was built on the success of UCLA, college basketball's Celtics, the amusement of watching the white guys at Duke who bust in the NBA, the coaches who just want to get their paycheck, the black guys from the Big East - oh and Dick Vitale hoarse throat. But most of all, it's the thrill of watching those with their backs to the wall beat those who owned the wall. It's about watching miraculous comebacks that you will never see in the NBA. The perfect example of this is Gonzaga against UCLA in '07 (I think it was in the Sweet 16). Down by about 16 or 18 points with 11 minutes to spare, UCLA was losing to Adam Morrison, who ends up seeing a picture of himself crying taped to his locker on his first day as a Laker (clever tricks by former-Bruins Ariza and Farmar). But Cedric Bozeman stole the ball, passed it up for a lay-up, and UCLA moved on. Even the greatest college player of all-time, Kareem Abdul-Jabbar agreed to turning off his T.V. with three minutes left. It seemed hopeless. But in a classic defense vs. offense clash, Jordan Farmar and Afflalo led the Bruins to a victory. The ultimate comeback. A disciplined team against an offensive jugernaut. That's what basketball is all about.

Enough with the NCAA for now though. Believe it or not, the NBA season isn't over yet and there still is a heated MVP race between Kobe and Lebron, even though D Wade should make a run for it too. But as I was reflecting on the MVP candidates, I couldn't help but associate them with Shakespearean characters. Lebron James is the Julius Caesar of the NBA. Most call him "the king" and has hypnotized his "witnesses" in droves (ex. a regular two-handed lay-up, with no fancy tricks at all, get Lebron ay least top 3 finish on Sports Center). But Kobe, being the noble person he is, is Brutus. Well-respected and will go on to murder the king, but does it for the good of his republic (a.k.a. the Lakers) and not out of jealousy. D Wade is Marc Antony, often seen with and a close friend of Caesar, is not the most powerful in the kingdom but does find a way to deceive those around him in the end. And while we're making these strange comparison, Chris Paul is Octavius. Currently young and inexperienced but is a good work-in-progress and heir to the throne. Paul Pierce is Cassius, jealous of those above him and talks crap about them whenever he gets a chance. Verdict: Lebron will most likely win MVP, and when he does, you can bet Cleveland fans will start complaining about why he wasn't also awarded the Defensive Player of the Year honors (which KB24 should be a candidate for).

RECOGNITION from one of my heroes in sportswriting:
"Ben--

We're kind of on hold for the moment, since I"m trying to vacation and sort out some other stuff while sticking with my paid engagements. But some advice, from the FD perspective: It seems like there's like three different stories packed in here. I like your take on the Kobe/Bron/Wade axis, especially because it includes Paul. But I'd do it as several character studies that, while framed in terms of Shakespeaer, offer the characters as points of reference or comparisons, not X=Y.

I also think there's something to be said for the tradition/madness binary in the NCAA tournament, but doesn't the "tradition and excellence" part only sink in during the later rounds? The first week(end) is entirely nuts, and no one knows what's going on, and shit can seem largely random.

Best,

Shoals "

(ED NOTE: HOLLLARRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!)

Brief Music Alert: check out MSTRKRFT's new album, First of God. (I'll try to review that album on another post).

The Black Eyed Peas are back -yup, that group with the black people and Fergie have reunited. If you've been to an NBA game, you've probably heard "Let's Get It Started" - and thought nothing of it. But the 808s in their latest single, Boom Boom Pow, make for a unique song, to say the least. Will.i.am's creativity and clarity along with Taboo's articulation are probably the greatest elements of the song. But the producer probably slacked off a little bit, allowing tens of seconds to pretty much be a bass pattern with vocals. But Fergie, amazingly enough, contributes that crucial swagger necessary to get airplay.

MUSIC

Justice vs. Ratatat (Bearbot Mash-up) -A dope blend of We Are Your Friends and Seventeen Years

Intergalactic vs. DJ Khaled- If you miss the class of the Beastie Boys, and are looking for a good techno vibe - rap combo - you should download this track.

Throw your sets up

2009-03-22T00:31:00.000-07:00

Dudes, I got fuckin tanked at that day party BROOOOOOOOO.

There are completely different standards for being a casual fan of the NBA and the tourney. Even though I am "Lakeshow till my wake YO" (copyright Pesos 2009), there are other players and teams I can legitimately root for. This fandom is based on knowledge of said players game, personalities, history, etc, and you connect to them. The same can be said of the players you can't stand. You've seen them play, know something about them or their history, and can pinpoint what it is that makes them wack.

The Tourney is a whole different animal. There is no real logical explanations as to why certain teams are raised to world-beating maccabis and others to dream-squashing monsters. Our fandom is based on more than our bracket; it is an expression of our world view. We take these teams not as a group of basketball players, but as symbols for entire regions, philosophies and cultures. (Duke= college basketball scientology.) College teams mean more in general; fans of a team are usually alumni, who have sports as an active representation of their alma mater. It's not about the players, they are only representing the school, or in the case of me, some greater idea. I was enthralled by the 2006 Final Four matchup between UCLA and LSU because it matched up the "kids from L.A." and the "kids from LA". Farmar, Afflalo and co. were carrying the tradition of Los Angeles kids against the freakish bayou athletes led by Big Baby and Tyrus Thomas. That UCLA team played some of the ugliest games I have ever seen, but it didn't matter. Style meant nothing when the pride of your birthplace was at stake.

This is why the UNC-Gonzaga game is the game I am by far the most excited about in this entire tourney. Why? This is the rare occasion when we can combine the abstract forces that drive our fandom with real-life connections to the players. I am of course talking about Tyler "Ya bro, I'm PSYCHO T, WATCH ME JUMP INTO THIS POOL, SAE!!" (photo) Hansbrough against Josh "Who the fuck gets busted for possession of mushrooms" Heytvelt. This is going to be basketball culture war. The All-American, super-hyped, "Dickie V on his speed dial for on call handjobs " forward from the 2nd best program in college basketball history. Do you know how hard he plays? Well, you're gonna be told over and over again. He hits the gym He's God's gift to college basketball, everybody loves him, even though he has no real game and the best player on his team is Ty Lawson.

Then we have Heytvelt. The school that brought us Stockton and Ronny and Adam Morisson when people were still impressed cause he had diabetes. West coast mid major conference. And the dude is down with psychedelics. We need not look into ourselves to find who to root for in this game. The stars have aligned to show us the way.

(Note: We are accepting guest posts at any time. Stop being lazy you douchebags.)

D/L: What Mean the World To You

(Note 2: You should be SOOO damn thankful for this track. Do you know how long I have searched for an untagged version of this remix. Do you know how much better Ludacris' opening is without Funkmaster Flex shouting out half of New York? And we are talking about young, just in the game, killing every remix Ludacris. And UGK is on this. This song is amazing.)

SOtD: Slackin'

2009-03-20T15:45:00.000-07:00

DONE-ZO!

Yes Yes Y'all

Well, as you can probably guess from the headline, I have in fact survived finals. I have emerged the insomniac daze in which I wandered for the last week, ready to break it down. By my count I've missed 3 days of SOtD's... so here's a post to make up for all that! I'm falling back into my banger's habit though, so if you don't like to get funky to super loud basslines going WONK WONK WOOOOOOKAKAKAKAKAKA! then you probably will not enjoy this post as much. But if you are... FEAST YOUR EARS! BECAUSE I TELL YOU MOTHERFUCKERS, I'M GONNA BE BUMPING THESE TRACKS AT MAXIMUM VOLUME AT ABOUT 2 AM TONIGHT, AND I WANT TO SEE YOU ALL THERE UNDER THE BLACKLIGHT GETTIN' FUNKY. DO IT.

SOtD: WE'RE DONE WITH FINALS LET'S GET CRUNK EDITION: 3/17-3/20. AS ALWAYS - ARTIST - SONG - DOWNLOAD - WHAT YOU NEED TO KNOW.

STAGE ONE: DRINKIN' BEERS, SIPPIN DRANK:
1. - BLACK ELEMENT - IT'S ALL RELATIVE (FAMILY FIRST) - DOWNLOAD = WAIT, HIP-HOP? FROM BOSTON? WTF IS GOING ON HERE? Well, it's just too damn West Coast to ignore, ironically enough. Old skool sample heavy chorus, flutes and horns, laid back rhymes about your fam... put this on to keep the atmosphere mellow while sober people are still showing up...
2. - BUCKETHEADS - THE BOMB (JOHN MAZELLA REMIX) - DOWNLOAD = This one is really just good because that little vocal sample is so good, but just cause it's simplistic doesn't mean it's not a shitload of fun...
3. - DJ MEHDI - TUNISIA BAMBAATA (MERCURY REMIX) - DOWNLOAD = WHAT'S THAT? THE 30 RACK'S JUST ABOUT GONE? Sheeeeeit! The spot is starting to get a little crackin', people in the kitchen starting to take out the vodka, making screwdrivers and greyhounds (vod+grapefruit juice..it's dank. try it), all the dude's on beer 4 or 5, definitely a little loosey goosey attitude starting to spread... so we put on this track, somewhere in between an electro banger and morocco... Toes are definitely starting to tap...

STAGE TWO: SHOTS!
1. - HEAVYFEET - WE GETTIN CRUNK (A1 BASSLINE REMIX) - DOWNLOAD = A1 BASSLINE OWNS MY BRAIN! Alright, vodka just ran out, oh shit, is that a handle of cuervo? NAH BITCH IT'S TITO'S! AMERICA, FUCK YEAH! Pretty self-explanatory - the song is about getting crunk, and A1 Bassline is always sick.
2.- DESIGNER DRUGS - BACK UP IN THIS(LE CASTLE VANIA + TOO MANY REMIX) - DOWNLOAD = People are now legitimately drunk. Dance party is suggested. The vodka's gone, so now everyone's taking shots of crown or henny because that's what's left. Start the dance party off by combining fat speakers with this song's overwhelming and ever-building bassline. When that shit drops you'll feel it in your chest, look up, and realize shit just. got. real.
3. - JACK BEATS - GET DOWN - DOWNLOAD = OH MY FUCKING GOD. props to tommy la hancha blancha for turning me on to this song. God. Damn. Just the sickest wobbly bassline, backed up by a seriously fucking pumped beat. HIGH ENERGY LEVEL. The blacklight just came on, and is that a strobe? Seriously. Is that girl breakdancing?
4. - DANCE AREA - AA 24/7 (DIPLO REMIX) - DOWNLOAD = D-D-D-D-DIPLO! Straight genius from Diplo... jt pesos posted this a little bit ago, but it bears re-posting. At this point, everyone's breaking it down, every single drop of booze has been consumed, the strobe is bustin', and then... THUMP THUMP THUMP... Bmore beats dropping like bombs, straight LAZER bass slicing through... great way to mix it up a bit from the straight electro feel...
5. - MR.OIZO - POSITIF (DJ MANAIA REMIX) - DOWNLOAD = I'm tired of writing descriptions. The friendly bmore beat that opens the song is just a trick to get people moving for the crazy oizo synths. definitely everyone should be tanked if this is coming on. WOO! YEAH!
6. - A1 BASSLINE - BAD MAN HORROR THEME - DOWNLOAD & BADMAN HORROR THEME (MUSTARD PIMP REMIX) - DOWNLOAD = We've been over this. A1 Bassline is the shit. The Mustard Pimp remix turns it from a song in a guy ritchie movie's big scene to the song from guy ritchie's nightmares.

STAGE THREE: CROSSFADED.
1. ESSER - LET'S WORK IT OUT (A1 BASSLINE REMIX) - DOWNLOAD = It's 2:30 am, there's 5 people left and everybody's drunk is starting the turn into fatigue... fortunately, one fat j later, everyone gets a sudden burst of energy, and breaks it down hard one last time. Times like these call for fat beats but also that pop vocal hook, make everyone realize how much fucking fun the night was.
2. CALVIN HARRIS - I'M NOT ALONE (DEADMAU5 REMIX) - DOWNLOAD = 4 am, dance party offically over, black light off, normal lights on, everyone's just wiped, collapsed on the couch. Another j, dj software off, put this on in itunes and walk away and collapse yourself.. Let the beat wash over you, smile, and get ready for tomorrow night...

THE END

Some Donuts? Why Not

2009-03-18T17:05:00.000-07:00

Here's some random shit:

Keeping with the study music theme here at your favorite blog, I just uploaded two of my favorite tracks from J Dilla's instrumental masterwork Donuts. If you are not familiar with J Dilla or the album, No Trivia goes into way more detail than anyone ever needs. These are two of the smoother tracks that I love playing when I need a little instrumental relaxation. The album should really be listened to all at once, so go do some work.

One Eleven

Two Can Win

THANK GOD FOR THE NCAA TOURNAMENT. Some games that finally MEAN SOMETHING. As long as Duke and UNC lose quickly, I will be satisfied. (Spoiler: GO ZAGS!)

I have become completely bored with this NBA season. There seems to be an important game once a month, and then I completely forget about it a little while after. Nothing is going to change before the playoffs: The Cavs have too easy a closing schedule with too many home games to not get home court in the finals. The Lakers season has come to a point of static. Hopefully the road trip coming up will get their head straight, like the earlier 6-0 eastward swing, but there is nothing left to prove, nothing new to bring out, at least until "Bynumite" comes back. In a way, there is no point to the right now Lakers do anything but go through the motions. This is not the team that they will have in the playoffs, and there is no difference for them on a night to night basis in the standings. That's a problem for me, and the NBA as a whole.

And there are no more funny commercials:

Spring break (I love old beer commercials):

Song of the Day: Successful All-Nighter Edition

2009-03-17T22:26:00.000-07:00

The Big Payoff

Song(s) of the Day: 3/16 & 3/17

SIGH OF RELIEF. *PHEW*. I sometimes amaze even myself with the lengths I will take my procrastination. No matter when I start working, or how long the assignment is, I simply cannot complete a paper a. more than 20 minutes before it's due, and b. without pulling an all-nighter. Something is wrong with me... I just can't bring myself to put pen to pad (well, finger to keyboard) until it's 2 am, and my higher cognitive functions are just slightly starting to erode. Once the caffeine I've been near-OD'ing on through endless pots of coffee peaks, it's a race against time to get as much written before I lose my ability to put together coherent sentences. I'm STILL feeling loopy, and I even got a couple hours of nap in. All-nighters make you feel like a crackhead once the sun comes out, and ruin your ability to be productive for the whole next day... so why do I do them? Besides my fundamental character defects, I think it's because I crave the relief that courses through your body when you're on the way back from turning in the paper, biking/getting driven by your roomate because he rocks/skating home, and your ipod 'shuffle songs' function just picks that absolute sunny day uptempo feel-good anthem you needed, and you realize you did it, you finished that motherfucking paper, and you're done with that class, and BAM! You're flying home but don't even feel like you're putting a dent in your energy level, head's bobbing, and everything is right with the world. Of course, then you get home and realize you're not gonna get anything useful done for the rest of the day, but oh well - crack a brew, enjoy the weather, and once you're bored of fucking around, get in bed, and feel your body just RELAX. See you tomorrow...

SOtD - 3 Part All-Nighter Edition - Artist - Song

Pt. 1 - It's 5 AM, 4 Pages Down, 6 to Go, So of Course I'm on Facebook: Audio Bullys - Flickery Vision (Rusko's Staying Awake Remix) - DOWNLOAD

Pt. 2 - The Big Payoff: Curtis Mayfield - Move on Up - DOWNLOAD

Pt. 3 - Sweet Oblivion: Booka Shade - Night Falls - DOWNLOAD

Download that shit! I guarantee you'll like at least one of the three (probably the Curtis Mayfield... but you never know!). If not, your money back and you can call me an asshole next time I see you.

Next Time, on TUWP 2: Barely Educated, ESPN personality David Thorpe actually answers my questions. Tune in tomorrow - same time, same channel!

Song of the Day: Study Sunday Edition

2009-03-15T21:54:00.000-07:00

I'll Be Brief

Finals suck big fat donkey dick. Some days (like today) are spent not doing anything fun, but just studying, studying, and studying some more. Occasionally you can break up the monotony with an awesome activity like laundry - RAD! On days like these it just feels wrong to listen to bangers - just makes you regret your situation even more, plus it's distracting. Instead, you need some nice relaxing tunes to soothe your brain and calm your nerves (especially if you're pounding coffee/using stronger stuff). Classical is theoretically the best thing for studying, but honestly it's just not my bag. I used to use jazz (just put Coltrane's discography on repeat in itunes...) but eventually that got distracting. Fortunately I've got Bonobo's album 'dial m for monkey' which is a real nice chunk of instrumental chill-ness (I wish there was a less horrible word I could think of to describe their style, but I'm failing), grounded in the pairing of downtempo, hip-hop inflected drumbeats and subtle-but-effective basslines, with multiple haunting melodies layered on top, with flute riffs coming in and out to pique your interest. Basically it makes me feels like an educated philosopher in my study, which is what I need during finals week. Hopefully it does the same for you.

SOtD - 3/15 - BONOBO - WAYWARD BOB - DOWNLOAD

BONUS - One more from the same album, so you can get a little work done. - BONOBO - NOCTUARY - DOWNLOAD

"Always Anytime 24/7"- JT$ Hard Recap

2009-03-15T16:29:00.000-07:00

Download this first: Dance Area- AA 24/7 (Diplo Remix) (Direct Link- DL quickly)

(I originally thought they said "Always Anti 24/7", which sounds dope to me, but looking back was a pretty weird chorus for a dance song.)

First of all, let me congratulate Dan on yesterday's post. Without mentioning that the post was one of the best we've put up, the fact that anything was written is an accomplishment in itself. I needed an extra day to get my head clear enough to write a post with anything resembling coherency. I'd like to thank Dan for spreading his feelings of peace and love. We like to give different perspectives here at TUWP, so I'm going to share some thoughts about the expericne. Here is my quick thoughts of the Hard 13 rave/ show/whatever the hell that was:

- Fuck all ages shows. You don't want to know how many kids had braces and headgear at this thing.

D.I.M.- Played this house jam classic. Reminded me of Italy. I was completely sober.

- I fully support hip-hop DJs like A-Trak(Kanye's former DJ and brother of Dave 1 of Chromeo, real name Alain Macklovitch, btw), , jumping into the electro scene by bringing some hip-hop influence to their remixes. Get money mi amigos.

A-Trak brings the funk party on this track: Bounce. Illy.

-For every white girl looking like a hooker from the 5th Element, there was a huge hombre rocking a baseball hat with a bandana over his mouth. In conclusion: LA is an interesting, ethnically diverse place.)

-My words to Dan during Erol Alkan: "You know why electro sucks? Because everybody is trying to be Erol Alkan, but nobody can touch him." Enough said.

Grade: A

Diplo: This is the main reason I came to Hard 13 and the main reason for this long-ass blog post. I will admit to wasting your time until now, because this was where everything went beserk for me. Diplo singlehandedly destroyed the place, and I don't mean that in a good "dude killed it, he was so great!" kinda way, but in a "warplane dropping a bomb on suspected terrorist house and leaving the bodies of innocent civilians in its wake." That's what the dancefloor looked like after he left.

Diplo came out a little after 1 am. With Lil fucking Jon. At this point many in the crowd were coming down from whatever drugs they had taken and just wanted to touch something and look at light shows. That is not the state you want an audience to be in when you have Diplo playing baltimore club music and fidget house with Lil Jon shouting his head off over it. The people could not keep up at all and I think dude just gave up and stuck to dubstep and threw in some hip-hop for fun. But fuck it, I love that he had the balls to be the only act on the bill that wasn't purely electro and fucked all the candy ravers up. "You wanna come to a rave and believe in PLUR(peace love unity respect, apparently), well, here's Lil Jon telling you to put your middle finger in the air and yelll "fuck them mothfuckas," with the video flashing "GET CRUNK". Beautiful. Extra points for baile funk and dancehall mixing it up:

Best part of the night: BMORE!!!! CROOKERS!

You might say, "Why would Lil Jon be at a rave?" Answer: Lil Jon is sampled in almost every single baltimore club song, and Diplo is a club DJ, not a rave DJ. Big ups to both of them.

-Conclusion: Make sure your pills are not mellow for Diplo.

Song of the Day: Hard 13 Edition

2009-03-14T20:35:00.000-07:00

LA is a HARD Place

So! Brand new feature here on the blog that I decided to make happen about 34 seconds ago, because I was just sitting in my room, headbanging violently to Jack Got Jacked (Jack Beats Remix) by AC Slater, having flashbacks to 2 am last night when Erol Alkan (or was it Diplo? it's all kinda hazy now...) dropped this banger, and the bass just annihilated my fucking life, and when I pried my lids open and looked around I could see that everyone else was rocking out just as fucking hard, and not much beats that feeling.. .and I decided that I wanted to share a little slice of the tunes that get me through the day with all of you (that's right, ALL of you - all 5000. or 6. It's one of those two numbers). Anyways, from now on I'm gonna upload a song to mediafire for you to download and get funky to. It's not gonna be all bangers - just whatever song happens to seem appropriate for that day, and maybe a little explanation of WHY that song. They'll mostly be .mp3s, some .m4a's - if for whatever reason you're not using itunes and you want an .mp3 version, if you take the effort to post in the comments i'll take the time to convert the file and repost it. Sweet!

SONGS OF THE DAY

FRIDAY THE 13th RETROACTIVE SOtD - AC SLATER - JACK GOT JACKED (JACK BEATS REMIX) - DOWNLOAD
-Q: Why is this song different from other SOtD's? (the fifth passover question..)
A: Last night Dan and JT Pesos went to the HARD 13 rave/electro concert/whatever at the Shrine Expo Center for a night of drugs, dancing, old friends, new friends, insane light shows and $4 bottles of water. While Lil' Jon showing up for Diplo's set was pretty funny, by far the lastingest impression from the night was hearing the absolutely insane dubstep-inspired house banging bassline from this song drop. Broke it down so hard, and then after retiring to a friend's pad up in the valley and posting up on the couch for two of the fattest j's ever seen (seriously, it was like the joint that grew up in the blunt neighborhood, always got made fun of for being a skinny little j, and so grew up overcompensating by being more blunt-y than a blunt. Bob Marley woulda smoked something like this joint) - and proceeded to fall into a sleep-like state of deep relaxation in which this song just kept replaying in my head. Woke up, it was still there - walking around all sounding like a crazy person (from the perspective of people who don't break it down) making "bwwwaaaaoow buppa bwwaoooowwww" sounds. SO SICK. Play this when the party's raging, everyone's drunk and the shit's about to get real.

SOTD - 3/14 - THE TOUGH ALLIANCE - NEO VIOLENCE (SHAZAM REMIX) - DOWNLOAD
-Q:Why is this song different from other SOtD's?
A: Because it's dedicated to something we can all relate to, even if we didn't go to HARD 13 - that day after you raged it too hard, till 5 in the morning. The day when you crawl out of bed/off the couch at 1 pm, pull your face together, pound some water, smoke a little weed and cruise to a fat breakfast. Those mornings-that-are-actually-afternoons full of dazed looks, fucked up hair, hangovers, sunshine, constant retelling of all the awesome shit that happened (that you can remember), and a rich and deep appreciation for how amazng your life is and how much you love your friends. For these days bangers are a little too much - everyone just wants to chill out, and this track is soaked in australian sunshine-groove. A bassline borne out of some weird coupling of 70's funk and 80's synth, haunting vocals, and a beat that bounces but doesn't bash you over the head. Pile into the car, roll down the windows, put this on, and everybody bob their head and think about how awesome last night was, and no matter how much you wish you could back but can't, you'll always the friends and the memories.

- Dan

Like Your Parents

2009-03-13T10:53:00.000-07:00

Not Angry - Just Disappointed

The Education of Trevor Ariza

Is there a more badass song than "One" to play after that? NO.

A brief little basketball related post here. So, espn.com, a website I frequent much more than I would like, has a stable of basketball writers. These guys get paid to write about ball all day (awesome!), and millions of people read their shit. In other words, while me and toobi are playing pick up games, they are playing in the NBA. They are the big time. One of my favorite writers is David B. Thorpe - he's a pro trainer who works with actual NBA players, so unlike most espn hacks he's not just making shit up - he's got real insight based on thousands of hours of working with, and watching tape of, nba players. He posts in-depth articles every week, and also has these weekly chats where people can ask questions and he answers them - stuff like this:

Steiny (NYC): If you had worked with Shaq on his free-throw shooting, how much do you think he could have improved? 5%? 10%?

David Thorpe: (12:24 PM ET ) I'm as confident in my ability as he is in his. 75% would have been the goal to start.

One day, a chatter asked Thorpe for some more detailed info, so Thorpe told him to hit him up on facebook. Being the little opportunist I am, a facebook stalking of Thorpe appealed to me.. I so searched for "David Thorpe", scrolled through 10 pages till I found the one from Tampa Bay, Fl, then scrolled through 2 more to find the RIGHT one from Tampa. I probably weirded the hell out of two other David Thorpes by friend requesting them with a message about basketball, opera, and movie quotes. Thorpe, being a cool guy, accepted my friend request, and when I asked him if he would be willing to answer some questions for a blog post of mine, he seemed down. I was pleasantly surprised, to say the least - here is a busy guy, getting paid to write about ball, willing to take time and answer the little guy's questions. Not to mention the sheer badassery of having David Thorpe, Pro Trainer and ESPN Analyst conducting interviews on MY blog - we would definitely be the most awesome 6-reader blog ever. So I cobbled together some questions about Trevor Ariza [Is "One" his theme song!? Fucking rad!], the freak athlete who is rapidly becoming my favorite Laker, and sent them over... and Thorpe got right back to me! Unfortunately, it wasn't to answer the questions, but to stall.

Feb. 17th (tues.) - I send the questions, Thorpe responds: "My pleasure! But I'm away with my family until thursday. Is it ok if I wait until then?"

Feb. 21st (sat.) - Still no response, so I shoot over a follow up email. Thorpe: "I'll have time to look at them this week. Doing rookies tomorrow and monday."

March 7th - Well, it's obviously been more than a week, and I don't wanna bug the guy, but I want my damn blog post! So I facebook him the questions again, under the 'just in case they got caught in the spam blocker' rationale. I mean that's the rationale I used - I know it's not true. Again, same day, Thorpe responds: "Dan-I'll get this taken care of this week."

March 13th - Well, wtf? I don't wanna be hassling the guy, and I'm tired of using this shit as an excuse for not posting, especially since Trevor just got moved into the starting lineup. He coulda just told me he didn't have time... but then I realize, hey, I already HAVE enough Thorpe answers for my questions - I read his chats all the time! - and this way I can make him agree with whatever point I'm trying to make. AWESOME.
So with no further ado, I present the exclusive Barely Educated Q & A with espn.com analyst David B. Thorpe!!!!

Here we go...

BE: Trevor pretty clearly is a valuable contributing member of the Lake Show, and I remember him always playing well in his brief chances in NY (where he was held up as part of Isiah's drafting acumen.. and can't hate on that! [just everything else]), and Orlando... basically noone's every denied he's a talented kid... so why did it take this long for him to get some consistent minutes?

David Thorpe: The head coach makes all the difference.

BE: How many Brian Cooks is Trevor Ariza worth? 3? 5? Also, why does Brian Cook have the facial hair of a vagrant? Laker fans have only contempt for the Cookie Monster.

David Thorpe: I honestly do not know.

BE: Let's assume that Orlando traded him b/c they thought he couldn't shoot the 3 (so vital in SVG's system). Although Ariza is no Ray Ray/Peja/etc., he's making about 30% of his attempts this year, and from my perspective at least, his stroke looks decent - maybe he'll never be a 40% guy, but 35% doesn't seem improbable to me, with more reps. Was this more a case of him always having had the fundamental ability but not being given the chance, or does his form look actually improved since his days in Orlando? Trevor seems to be a hard worker, so I could see either one.

David Thorpe: It's no surprise players play better when being pushed.

BE: On that note, could you briefly assess his progress as a ball handler? When we traded for him the rep was that he was a jumper, that's all, but he's shown more than that in LA.

David Thorpe: Honestly, I'm so impressed with his resurgence. He looks terrific. Credit their coaches. And him, of course.

BE: Finally, given all of the above, what do you see as Trevor Ariza's ceiling? Very-good non-All Star (a la battier/bowen)? Couple time all-star? Essential key to title runs (Dennis Green/Michael Cooper)? Something else?

David Thorpe: He's impressed me a great deal. Can be an all-star. But he has a long way to go.

BE: It's been inspirational.

David Thorpe: Seriously, I'm in the inspiration business. That's step one for coaches. So I sincerely thank you.

ps.
Bonus Questions: what's your favorite food? favorite hip-hop song if any? favorite opera? favorite seinfeld episode? favorite character? Is Lamar still Elaine with the way he's been playing? Who wins in a fight, Ronny Turiaf or Josh Powell (a.k.a. ronny 2.0)? Would you mind if I e-mailed you at some later date with more questions/ideas/whatever? Thanks again!

David Thorpe: Enough-we don't know!!

Well, there you have it! Information straight from the experts! And yes, these are all direct quotes. Quite informative! Well this was a huge waste of time. Maybe me and Toobi will sit down and discuss these questions amongst ourselves next week... when we're not getting fucked in the ass by finals. And new starter Trevor Ariza is making high-flying plays on offense, using his plastic man arms on d, and never smiling. ever.

- Dan

BONUS: a really sloppy mix of the electro bangers i've been listening to recently... this time it is actually a mix and not a retarded .zip file (and I stopped using zshare b/c of the wait time), so fear not.. 25 megs! Fucking check it out! (or don't, it's pretty sloppy). This was pretty spur of the moment, once finals are over I'll have the time to actually sit down and get a more polished one out. Enjoy!

DOWNLOAD [MEDIAFIRE]

Tracklist:
Artist - Track (Remixer) - [My comments...]
Sticky K - The Weirdo [props to rod for getting his LP out! check it here- BANDARI FUNK]
Lykke Li - Little Bit (Death to the Throne Remix) [I love any and all remixes of this track]
Audio Bullys - Dope Fiend (Tommie Sunshine & Udachi Remix) [Not that I endorse drug use...]
Proxy - Tha Raven - (Kasey & MPC Remix) vs. (Polymorphic Remix)
TC - Where's My Money (Caspa Remix - JACK BEATS RE-EDIT) [remix of the remix... DUBBY]
Foreign Beggars - Hit That Gash (DJ PrimeCuts Remix) [Misogyny! beat is dirty though...]
Qemists - Dem Na Like Me (A1 Bassline Remix) [A1 Bassline is the SHIT. More on him soon...]
Blackfinger - UMF (Supra1 Remix) [DUB]
E-40 & Lil Jon - Turf Drop (Dj Doza Remix) - [SF Electro Stylezzz.. The cut out of this one sucks]
Reset! - Gasa [Italian steez]
U2 - Get On Your Boots (CROOKERS REMIX) - [FRESH Crookers shit... it's been a while!]
Rusko - Woo Boost - [From Crookers' "We Make it Good" mixtape - get the whole thing here]

I love you all! THANK YOU CLEVELAND!!! And now, off to the shrine expo center for some loud noises.

hard 13 is coming...

2009-03-10T19:17:00.000-07:00

We're BACK (sorta)

Finals are not blog-conducive. Unless I really need to procrastinate, then I'll probably write up some kind of quick recap of HARD 13 this Friday.

Eventually I'll put some recent mixes up, but this will do.

so here's a mix I made a long time ago in one take...

JT Pesos- Fucking around with bmore club tracks

DOES ANY1 EVER READ THIS BLOG?

2009-02-25T20:41:00.001-08:00

If not, I can use it to talk endless shit about people I know. Please leave a comment if you would like this site to change its format to "bringing back juicycampus for the 100 people Toobs knows and really dislikes." Otherwise, leave a comment that says you like our blog, or if there is anyway to improve it. I'd really like some feedback, and for Dan to start posting again.

DETOX SOUNDS LIKE A SHITTY TI ALBUM! KID CUDI STILL AWESOME

2009-02-23T15:05:00.000-08:00

So I think I know why Detox took so long to come out. I think it would have been dope in 2002, then Dre wanted to hype it up. But in that time period, music has just passed it by. This is not next level shit, it's absolutely basic, radio-friendly rap. Nothing special here. "Topless" is pretty tight, and I love the chill feel of "Shit Poppin Off", but none of these songs hold a candle to old Dre shit. And why the fuck is TI on every single song? Is this a trick, or is this just a Dre-produced T.I. album? And why can't I find any rap bloggers talking about this. THIS IS FUCKING DETOX, THE MOST HYPED ALBUM EVER! WE'RE ALL SUCKERS!

Maybe I overreacted right there, all I'm saying is that this new shit coming out from Dre and Aftermath, and that includes Eminem's "Crack a Bottle", is just not all that impressive.

Listen for yourself, unless your a little bitch who is too lazy to go onto links, then just stop reading this blog altogether.

"Topless" -Fader Link

"Shit Popped Off"

"This is Detox" -quesionable if Dre

Compare this to two of the brighter young gunner rappers who kill it (once again), with this new song "Look Up At Da Stars." Seriously, this song is the shit and I can't get enough of it, tags and all.

Cudi and Wale- "Look Up at da stars"

BTW, in the top ten most annoying things you can do: go to a table where somebody has left there stuff in the library and sit across from them, then look at shit with your boyfriend while giggling and whispering to each other. EAT SHIT, DIE!

THE FUCK IT SONG OF THE DAY

2009-02-19T14:52:00.000-08:00

There is a category of music I like to call "Fuck it" music, which is music I like when I'm pretty much "Fuck it" about everything and just wanna blast some shit while driving, walking, biking, jumping off the walls, etc. In my mind, I said "I don't give a fuck, ho. Pause." Now just in time for the weekend, THESE come out.

My two favorite "We Don't Give a Fuck Remixes":

Cousin Cole

Eli Escobar (squeaky voice don't give a fuck, ho)

And yes, the original is from Philly's finest, Emynd (producer) and State Prop's own Young Chris. Makes me long for the days when Roc-a-Fella was still dope:

some more club shit hotness from Emynd: Emynd- Hangin On

Damn, I guess Philadelphia is DOPE

That Hot New Shit

2009-02-17T13:17:00.000-08:00

THIS POST TO BE AURALLY ACCOMPANIED BY THIS POST
The Party Starts Hot, Don't Stop

The order was thoughtfully planned... but may or may not translate. Use the 'freshshit.txt' file.

remember kids, support your local artists.

Pesos Song of the Night

2009-02-12T15:27:00.001-08:00

We are drinking whiskey tonight.

This shit slaps hard, cause I'm a real funky dude these days.

WHERE CAN I GET SOME ST. IDES!?!?!?!

2009-02-11T20:20:00.000-08:00

I bet Lamar drank St. Ides all the time growing up. (I guess this is me finally covering some hip-hop)

Snoop and Nate's song to start (hot shit):

Biggie:

Wu-tang:

Red and Meth:

Dre:

Snoop and Pac:

Ice Cube and the Geto Boys?

I'm drowning my Utah sorrows in these videos

Absitnence is the Only Proven Form

2009-02-10T11:09:00.000-08:00

Taking a Break

Sometimes, the only way to appreciate something is go without it for a bit. Sometimes, though, it's more just about getting healthy - like not smoking anything (even though you REALLY WANT TO) all week, because you've got a cough. Or, like I'm doing this week, not engaging with the massive sports-information-complex that dominates my internet time. That's right, one week, and I'm not checking espn.com, truehoop, dimemag, forumblueandgold.com, not one of them. I will watch Lakers games. That is all. Any analysis will have to come from within. The intent of this is twofold: clarify my own thoughts on the Lakers for future posts, and in addition, STOP WASTING SO MUCH TIME READING ABOUT SPORTS ON THE INTERNETS. I mean for a series of tubes I spend way too much time on it reading about what other people who know just as little as I do think about large men running around and throwing balls. Hopefully this energy can be channeled into something slightly more productive. We'll see.

we always do

studying gives me SERIOUS DELIRIUM

2009-02-08T18:56:00.001-08:00

Classic.

And then I'm thankful for rainy weather and listen to this, cause I'm a real soulful dude these days.

(just search for it online and you can download it real easy. My zshare game is nowhere near as tight as Dan's is)

The song is also featured on this mix, entitled "Winter Sadness Mix" by DJ Eleven of The Rub. Some nice jams there.

And the flipside of the single that I can't download anywhere:

"I'm, like, so subtle right now"

2009-02-08T18:20:00.000-08:00

"I can't wait to get home and put my feet in some sand." Dude looks fly no matter what, even in the airport.

Post to be accompanied by this.

(Hint: I'm lazy and could only think of the Queens connection. Leave a comment for the perfect Lamar song.)

You can learn a lot about someone by how they feel about Lamar Odom. His game can be deconstructed to show that he is an ovverrated, one-handed, can't finish slacker. He is constantly criticized for not being aggressive enough (fuck you very much, Mr. Plaschke). The totality of his presence on the Lakers goes far and beyond anything as simple as his stat sheet and his below average numbers from this year. Lamar, as a player, is best described as "human." If you have read the FreeDarko Almanac's chapter on Lamar, they express how he plays the game with his life's experiences always on his shoulders. When I watch the merciless tenacity of Kobe, I am amazed. I can admire the unwavering professionalism of Fisher. But with no other player do I feel a personal attachment like Lamar.

Lamar has played the game of basketball the same way his entire life. You can imagine his graceful moves to the left (always), his long rebounds and his handle up the court would dominate players in grade school, high school and college. For him, basketball is always a game. He is not going to do what you expect, he is going to do what feels right to him. He doesn't care what your expectations of him are, because those are yours. He will do right by him, because basketball is what it is to him, and him alone. He has no lofty goals of being the greatest ever, he just wants to support his family by playing this game. He does not turn into some superhero on the court, he stays Lamar at all times. There is no extra mode, instead he stays happy. That is what people like Bill Simmons miss when they predicted Lamar would sulk on the bench in his contract season. Lamar doesn't know how to sulk when he plays basketball. He goes with the flow, only slightly moving the flow when his will is brought on. He jokes around on the bench the same way he jokes around in games the same way he jokes around on the street. His personality is what allows players like Ariza to flourish: while they will never be able to satsify Kobe, Lamar will always be there to make sure they are alright.

"hey I'm Coby Karl!"

Which brings us back to the present. I predicted that Lamar would push for a contract against Boston and Cleveland as that would be the perfect time to change the flow and reap the most benefits, with the two most important road games on national tv of the season. In the first half of the Boston game, I couldn't have been more wrong. Quick fouls sent him to the bench with no impact at all. Then it all changed.

If a basketball player could have a nemesis, Lamar's would be Kevin Garnett. They have so much in common on the court with similar games and similar high expectations when coming to the league. But while Lamar is at constant peace with himself as a player and stays the same relaxed dude at all times, Garnett is his polar opposite. For Garnett, the intensity of the game never leaves him. He is always ready to explode and takes his court persona with him everywhere during the season. He is also one of the most insecure players, despite all his accomplishments, from being the centerpiece of so many losing teams, thus making his need to trashtalk at all times on the court. Lamar talks when he plays out of happiness; Garnett out of fear and anger. (Check forum for a better analysis of what I'm talking about.) Anyway, the ass-slap was the two personalities clashing. Lamar jokingly slaps Garnett and KG gets in his face; a classic expression of two men displaying their differences. When KG went at him, he was not putting down Lamar's act, he was putting down everything about him. He was getting in the face of being passive, of having fun on the court, of passivity. KG tried to assert his way of thinking on the situation to say that he is the epitome of the alpha dog and there would be no joking with the alpha dog.

Consciously or not, Lamar got under KG's skin. He insulted the alpha dog, but did not step down at all. He stayed in his face and talked shit back. (BTW, Lamar should be mic'd up for all games at all times.) The man is peaceful, but is not a pacifist. He cannot match KG's intensity, so he must use other tricks. His slap was a mindgame for KG where Lamar clearly showed that he will not sacrifice his soul for this game the way KG had. KG's mind could not handle the completeness of Lamar's cool during this game. You can see it on his way back down the court, as he brushes his butt and adjusts his shorts, as if Lamar's hand was still there, taunting him.

“Basketball is a humiliating sport, it can humble you right in the middle of the game,” Odom said. “But tonight I just left all that behind.” This statement by Lamar to KG ran through his play the rest of the game and into the Cleveland game. But he stayed himself. Making those two ft's in overtime in Boston further cemented his new outlook. He played confident that he could challenge the flow of the game and overcome it. But he never lost his personality. After the game, he said he game a prayer for his mother before sinking the ft's. Lamar never leaves his life from the game.

And so we have Lamar breaking out against Cleveland, basically fulfilling all the expectations any of his fans could have wanted from him. He was in complete control, played within the game, and dominated. He gives hope to everyone who has been labeled an underachiever because of outside expectations. If Lamar can change, then maybe we can all change for the better. There is no "got it" moment where Lamar had to give up his self to achieve all this and suddenly changed. The change was subtle and part of the evolution of one's self. Lamar showed that sometimes to achieve that next level, we don't need to change who we are, but rather need to reaffirm who we always knew we were.

(note: there has been no editing or rereading of this post. )

Jockin on them haters man

2009-02-03T14:24:00.000-08:00

Is that a crutch or a pimp cane?

My blogging shitstorm begins now.

Andrew Bynum is out for 8-12 weeks with a torn ligament in his knee. This is a definite blow to the team. You could feel a sense that "the dream is over" when he went down.

Yet I am taking this news amazingly well.

Why you might ask? Isn't this just like last year? Don't we need him to compete for a title?

First, this injury is COMPLETELY different from last years. Most importantly, there will be no surgery. It just needs time to heal. He's not gonna have to do rehab or anything like that, so when they say 8-12 weeks, I believe he will be back at the latest in 12 weeks. Did anybody see his interview before the Lakers played the Knicks. He did not seem stressed AT ALL. He seemed like he enjoyed the attention, of people asking how he feels. I know he's a dumbass kid, but there was no look of worry from a guy who already knows how bad an injury can be. As long as some freak accident doesn't happen, I have no reason to believe he won't be there for the playoffs and the Finals.

And that is really all that matters. If you watched any of the NBA personalities on TV last night, the question they all had to answer was "how does this change the West?" And because of their contractual obligation to act like somebody besides the Lakers will represent the conference in the Finals, they talked about San Antonio, Denver, etc. It's all a grand scheme to make it seem games like Denver vs. New Orleans are worth watching cause they could have some implication on who comes out of the West. I'm sure people at NBA TV were jumping for joy when Bynum went down, saying "Yes, the West is wide open again! We can talk about how San Antonio is waiting in the wings and the Hornets are maturing!"

Total bullshit. No one is catching the Lakers. Hollinger agrees in his per diem. San Antonio? Seriously? Did you watch the series last year? This is where people say retarded things like "Roger Mason really brings a new dimension to this team." And New Orleans and Utah have both fallen off cliffs this year. So just stop making a fool of yourself and start thinking of who the Blazers can trade for with Raef Lafrentz expiring contract so they can compete NEXT YEAR.

(They should also be talking non stop about who the Cavs can get for Wally's expiring contract. That thing is huge, and there are some biiiig fish out there that could be traded. Amare anyone? And on the topic of the Cavs, can people stop acting like they are soo decimiated by injuries because Delonte West isn't in? ITS DELONTE FUCKING WEST! Just cause he plays next to LeBron and has a basketball brain does not make him expendable, its just that the Cavs suck so bad that no one can fill his tiny role.)

If this costs us home court in the Finals, so be it. There was no guarantee we would have the better record than Boston or Cleveland with Bynum anyway.

So what comes of this? Maybe the shock will make the Lakers focus, so they might actually care about beating teams like Charlotte. And is it so bad to have a team that took Boston to 6 in the Finals with a much improved Trevor Ariza terrorizing everyone on the court? I think not.

In other news, the "Lamar Odom Contract Year Push" SHOULD begin this Thursday. But being Lamar, I could be completely wrong, but on the road against Boston in his second game back as a starter would go a long way to making people forget that he hasn't done shit all year to try and boost his value, not to mention last year's performance against them. You have to wonder if Lamar even knows/cares its his contract year. He's like the high school slacker who doesn't care what he gets on his SAT's because he can just go to community college, except this community college gives him 8-10 mill a year. (BTW, I've been wanting to write something on Lamar, expect that sometime before the season ends.)

Get Up, The Sun's Out, Where Are We?

2009-01-29T10:59:00.000-08:00

This Post to be Aurally Accompanied By:
The Tough Alliance - Neo Violence (SHAZAM Remix)

This post, like the last one, is best enjoyed while listening to the extremely groovy 70's (if that decade was more about X than blow) style synth-laden dance number up there. If that shit doesn't get your toe tapping a little bit not only are you probably not alive, but you were probably a very uninteresting and timid person during your mediocre and conventional life.

Which brings us to THIS and THIS. Basically, the internets (and my brain) are aflame with rampant speculation about the 2009 Coachella line-up, with questions #'s 1 - 867 being: WHERE THE FUCK IS IT. Question #868 is: Please god tell me that the Britney Spears rumor is just some sick sick joke. I mean, Jack Johnson headlining is some weak shit, but it wasn't actually REPELLLENT. I don't care if Britney is stuck on the Outdoor Theatre or in the Navajo Tent (or whatever the smallest one is) at 12:30, competing with AC Slater and some Peruvian Flute Band (that uses electro-flutes made of eco-trash or some shit whatever) and the 110 degree heat.... SHE SHOULD NOT BE AT COACHELLA. That being said, if they do put her in said situation she will probably die of heatstroke, so there's that, and all the gay dudes who drive down from W. Hollywood would be pretty stoked, and it's good to keep them happy, to avoid fashion crimes.
Which brings us back to the semi-realistic rumors. The 'confirmed' bands have been 'confirmed' by people on the Coachella message board e-mailing/myspacing them... so who knows. But most of these make a lot of sense, and aren't big enough to have label shills screening their email yet...

The Bug - Wicked rad English grimy dubstep-ish from the old school. A-
Buraka Som Sistema - These guys are actually confirmed by Goldenvoice (coachella organizers). Kuroda (African break beat) dudes from Portugal. International fat beats. B
Crystal Castles - Come on, you should know them. A man and a lady from Germany who switch between raping my ears with horrible distorted vocals and making sweet love to them with chewy beats that make you want to move like a big rubber band. A-
Drop The Lime - NYC blog house extraordinaire. Domestic fat beats. B
Fleet Foxes - Folk. Some people like soft songs, some don't. If you like tender songs with acoustic guitars and lyrics that make me want to sit alone in a forest looking for gnomes (maybe that's just me) you would not be disappointed by blazing a fattie and lying back for their performance. B-
Flying Lotus - Instrumental beat production from the city of angels. LA's answer to J-Dilla...but alive and making fresh shit. This is what the Neptunes would sound like if they hated selling out and did a lot of acid and maybe moved to Morocco for a bit. If the Dailai Lama was a gangsta rapper Flying Lotus would definitely produce his debut. SO SICK. A+
Girl Talk - If you don't know who Girl Talk is you should probably not go to Coachella. A
No Age - More of the nuevo Los Angeles vanguard of independent music, with a similar ethos but almost inverse implementation as Flying Lotus. Two guys with guitars and a drum set and some effects pedals and an inspiring ability to shape noise and intertwine it with fun punk songs about being dead and other such things. If all the broken guitar amplifiers in the world gained sentience and started a music scene these guys would be like the fucking Ramones, but sadder. Music to lie down in the middle of the street to. A+
Late of the Pier - Really silly Nu-Rave (I promise I didn't make that term up) from ye olde U.K. that brings the ability to get you grooving while still including somewhat useless guitar solos. If the Klaxons were raised by carnies. Listening to their album feels kind of like going to RAVE: THE MUSICAL, but I kind of dig that - I imagine a lot of really extravagant set pieces and 90 kids in stunna shades and neon tank tops and skinny pants all rocking out in sync. B+
The Presets - 'Popular' Australian electro. If you meet an Australian hipster you should tell them you like the Presets before they sold out. Doesn't mean that you can't enjoy breaking it down to big electro synths and 4/4 backbeats occasionally, even if their singer does sound like he should maybe be in a Tears for Fears cover band. B-

All of these bands (if they actually are in the line-up, which I'd guess is like 70-80% likely) are probably going to be stuck playing in the no-man's time of 12:30-3:30, when the sun is at its apex, and most everyone is distracted from the music by the ever-looming threat of heat stroke. This is kind of bullshit, but seems to be some sort of rite of passage for new Coachella bands. Like hazing the rookie. Two years ago we saw Hot Chip at like 2:30 and I honest to god saw someone just up and fucking melt into a big puddle of goo in the middle of the tent. Last year they got a 5:30 slot. By that logic I'm hoping two of my favorite beat droppers - Deadmau5 & Boysnoize - who got early slots last year will be scheduled for a more reasonable hour this time. That being said, all of these acts are pretty quality, and if this is the pre-dusk line-up then the Coachella people got their heads on straight. This is the real shit. Even worth leaving the shade tents before 3:00....

BONUS: How sick is this? Basketball, much more so than football or baseball, presents the capacity for individual style and expression (which is of course the motivation for a website like freedarko [whom i am kind of ripping off]), and a clip like this makes you realize both the sort of crazy shit that NBA athletes could pull off, and how little they try. If I don't see one Wade-LeBron-Dwight double oop during the All-Star game I want my emotional investment back. That shit would be like Cirque du OH SNAP!

p.s. - click the band names

The Definition of Chillin'

2009-01-26T23:36:00.000-08:00

This Post To Be Aurally Accompanied By:
We Are The People (Ted & Francis Remix)

This first post feels so artificial, so forced, which of course is a concern based upon the assumption that anyone will actually ever read this. Trying to tailor a drug-and-sports-and-pop-culture induced rant to an audience is naturally gonna present some difficulties. So basically, I'm going to ignore the idea of an audience, and I'm going to ask you all (all 3 of you) to give me a free pass for a couple posts. If I suck, it's not for lack of effort or material, but rather the hesitance and vagueness that accompanies any new endeavor. Think of what Andrew Bynum looked like during his first two seasons. If I get crammed on by the Shaq of confusing sentence structure and a lack of compelling analysis, the hope is that I will respond with a spin move of humourous anecdotes and my own dunk of an accurate description of my twisted perception of the NBA, electro-bangers (Toobi handles hip-hop), movies, politics, drunkeness, pot, bruises, Australia, that girl you always see on the way to class, craft-brewing (Steve's department), loudspeakers, God, the Internet, the World, and Everything. Eventually I will grow into my 7 ft. body (writing style) and will become a double-double machine and clog the lane. Interpret that as you will.

Real Shit Coming Soon Like Tomorrow.